Well...not really...but...as you know...the blog...Life According to Jane...has moved to the new Jane Carroll Author website...same great blogs...just a different location...
I hope you'll join...me...and...Bertha...at our new home...just click on the above links...and you'll go right there...we'll leave the light on for you...
Jane
Life According to Jane
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
There’s a New Page in Town…
I know…I’m kind of strange…okay…a lot strange…but…I sort of get attached to things…and…when…it’s
time to replace them…I feel…guilty…like…I’m hurting their feelings…
Case in point…I bought a Townie…a
cruiser type of bicycle…and…rode it for a couple of years…going places…and riding
distances…that were fairly noteworthy…but…finally…one day…it was time…to get a
fancy Trek road bike…and…I love it…but…for
the longest time…I felt guilty every time I took it out for a spin…and left the
Townie in the garage…
See…I wasn’t kidding when…I said I was strange…
So…anyway…here’s the deal…most of you have seen my beautiful
new website…I love it…Rebbekah White and Kim Mutch Emerson…did a great job with
it…I think it really captures…my personality…and Bertha’s spirit…perfectly…
There’s just one thing…I feel guilty…when I visit the old
blog…I feel like I’m being disloyal to it or something…and…I’ve been double
posting…which is really kind of ridiculous…if you think about it…
I’ve said it was…because…I have some friends…who have
subscribed to the old blog via email…and…the new site doesn’t have that option
at this point…but…Bertha…says…it goes
deeper than that…
She…says…it’s the blog…that got me started writing again…that
connected me with some wonderful friends…that helped me find my voice again…and…that’s
why it is hard to leave it…
And…I suppose she’s right…I am connected to that blog…but…I’ve
made a choice…to continue growing into…the writer…the person…that I am…and…just
like with the bicycle…it’s time for the next step…
So…this will be my last double post…for some of you…your
last post via email…for now at least…I hope you’ll still come by and visit…I’ll
miss you if you don’t…
Oh…and…all the old posts are archived here…so…you can still
find your favs…right on the new site…
And…when I think about it…it really wasn’t such a difficult
move…no boxes…no moving trucks…just lots of fond memories…to rearrange…
Jane
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Swim Dress Ready…
I got an email today…from a health
and fitness magazine…touting that I could be bikini ready in…four weeks…I deleted
it…
Now…I hate to sound negative…but…come
on…I’ve never been bikini ready…not even when I had the body for it…actually…way
back in the day…Mama wouldn’t even let me have a two-piece…much less a bikini…I
think I got my first two-piece…maybe my senior year in high school…and trust me…it
wasn’t skimpy…and…I could count the number I’ve had since then…on my fingers…probably
on one hand…
So…it got me to wondering…if I were
young…and…thin…today…would I still be too self-conscious to wear a bikini…probably…but…I’ve digressed from what
was originally on my mind…
The article…
I have to wonder…how could anyone
who was actually…overweight…and…out of shape…be bikini ready in four weeks…I mean…think
about it…on a reasonable diet…I could expect to lose a maximum of 10 pounds…in
a month…and…with a really dedicated workout schedule…I could tone some…but…not
from flab to washboard abs…
So…I’m thinking…this program…is a
lot like that book that I bought last summer…that claimed…you could look
thinner without losing weight…all you had to do was wear…a full spanx body
armor…not sure how that would look in a
bathing suit…oh…but…wait…if you were more than 10 pounds overweight…you’d
better diet…
So…maybe the article should have
read…if you are within three pounds of your goal weight…and…reasonably in shape…you
can be bikini ready in four weeks…for the rest of you…better luck next year…and…here’s
a link…for swim dresses…
Which then reminds me of the best
title…other than…Bertha-Size Your Life!...that
I ever saw…I Know why the Manatee SwimsNaked (I’ve Shopped for Bathing Suits, Too)…it just kinda sums it all up…doesn’t
it…
Jane
Labels:
Bertha,
Diet,
Exercise,
Swim Dress,
Swimsuit,
Weight Loss
Monday, May 7, 2012
Truffles Anyone…
Yesterday was the perfect day…for
pulling weeds…it was cloudy and cool…and then it rained…and remained pleasant
for a couple of hours until the sun came out…so the temperature was just right…and
the ground was soft…perfect for weed pulling…
I have to admit…I’ve had plenty of…reasons…AKA…excuses…for not completing the job before…I’m not sure why yesterday
inspired me…maybe…it was a blog I read recently…about how spiritual it felt to
weed…
And…quite honestly…the entire
experience of being out in nature…hearing the birds…feeling the breeze…smelling
the nearby roses…and…just being alone with my thoughts…actually was spiritual…but…so
is sitting in my Granny’s rocker…so…don’t get too excited…
Anyway…as I was pulling weeds from
the dry creek…I decided it was time to clean out the pot from last year’s
asparagus fern…it had become infested with vetch…that had wandered over…from
the empty lot next door…I wasn’t sure what I wanted to plant there…but…job one
was to clean it out…as I clipped away at the vetch…I noticed the strangest
thing…right in the center of last year’s dead fronds…was…a baby asparagus fern…pretty
as you please…it was a mild winter…it hadn’t completely died…I carefully…trimmed
out the dead fronds and weeds…delighted with my baby fern…
Then…there was the pot of lamb’s
ear…it had hung in there for most of the winter…before biting the dust…I
started to clean out the pot…and…yep…there were the cutest little lamb’s ears
you ever wanted to pet…right there under all those dead leaves…
The mosquito geranium…is making a comeback
as well…
Now…I’m not promoting
procrastination…although…I could be the
poster child…it did make me think…if I had dumped these plants in March…like
I kept telling myself that I should…I would have thrown away…my baby plants…
What I’m thinking is…I really wasn’t
procrastinating after all…I was listening to my instinct…and…my instinct…said…wait…at least…that’s my story…and I’m
sticking to it…
Bertha…rolled
her eyes…and…said something about…even a blind pig…finding…a truffle once in a
while…
Hmmm…wonder what
she meant by that…
Jane
Sunday, May 6, 2012
But…It Was on Sale…
A bargain is only a bargain…if…you
need it! ~Bertha
I must admit…I’ve done it…it…being…buying something…that…I wasn’t
shopping for…that…I have a questionable
need for…simply because…it was there…and…it was…such a good deal…
Now…Bertha…has been quick to point out the fallacy of this…yes…that’s
the same…Bertha…who wouldn’t pass up
a shoe sale…on a dare…probably not even a double-dog dare…and…we all know…the
power of the double-dog…
Anyway…when I proudly display my
latest…good deal…she has started
asking me…these…stupid…hmmm…I mean…these questions…
Do
I need it…does it match anything I have…does it fit…do I love it…would I have
bought it at full price…
Then…like a dog with a bone…she
goes on…
What
about the cost…how does the 50% I paid…fit into my budget…and…she reminds me…$200
worth of bargains…is still $200…even…if
the receipt says I saved…$200…I still spent…$200…and…somehow…when it comes to
my bank balance…that ain’t really saving…
She’s right of course…and…I’m busted…as I remember the arm loads
of clearance clothes…still sporting tags…that I eventually gave away…because…they
either never fit…well…I meant to lose
weight…geez…or…I never found anything…just that shade…of…periwinkle…or…chartreuse…to
pull it off…and that…oh…I can always wear
it with black…doesn’t always get it either…
Bertha…says…it’s
actually part of living my truth…asking myself the…questions…as she calls them…before I make a
purchase…especially…an impulse purchase…and…if…the answers…are…no…then…putting it back on the rack…and…walking
away…
I have a feeling…I’m going to be
doing quite a bit of walking in the future…I wonder…will that count as exercise…hmmm…
Jane
Saturday, May 5, 2012
Where Have All the Dresses Gone…
This morning…I wanted to sit on my
porch…and…I really didn’t want to get dressed…but…I really didn’t want sit out
in my nightgown…either…not…that anybody could really see me…not like most of my
neighbors were even up…well…except for one neighbor…who brings her dog out
early…and…can see my side porch from her yard…so…I guess it was for her…that I decided
to get dressed…
As I poked through my closet…I didn’t
find a thing to meet my needs…it was then I remembered…those dresses that I used
to have…that my friend referred to as…indoor-outdoor
dresses…loose…baggy…not requiring foundation undergarments…just as comfy as
a nightgown…but…a little more respectable…when answering the door…or venturing
out for the mail…
A sense of nostalgia swept across
me…not unlike the wind blowing tumbleweeds across the plains…where had all my…indoor-outdoor
dresses…gone…I knew I didn’t have them anymore…but…I dug…in the bottom of
drawers…just in case…only to come up…with painting shorts…and…a lab coat…leftover from my hospital days…and…I continued
to remember…housedresses…muumuus…dusters…none
of which were in my closest…
I settled on wearing…baggy shorts…and…a
baggier tee…they served the purpose…sans
foundation undergarments…but…somehow they just aren’t the same…I want nostalgia…I
want an indoor-outdoor dress…and…I think…I just might look for one…today…but...that would require...undergarments...hmmm...
Jane
Friday, May 4, 2012
On a Wet Tin Roof…
I love the sound of rain…on a tin
roof…the ping…ping…ping…so relaxing…mesmerizing…unfortunately…I don’t have one…but…what
I do have…is a gutter…and…when the rain hits the gutter…it makes that same…pinging…sound…
That’s the sound I heard yesterday
morning…right after I got up…before I turned on the radio…loud enough…to wake the neighbors down the street…I could hear the
soft landing…of so many little drops…as they hit the gutter…before sliding down
into the yard…
I admit it…it was dark…but…I went
outside anyway…so…I could hear it better…such a soothing sound…it really didn’t
matter…that…I didn’t have a tin roof…I had a gutter…
Bertha…reminded
me of a phrase…that…Granny…used to say a lot…and…that is…making do…
Now…I’m sure…most of you are
familiar with that phrase…and…in these economic times…there’s still a lot of making do…essentially…doing without…
At first glance…the phrase does
seem to mean…settling…settling for
something less than what I want…because…I can’t afford it…or otherwise can’t
have it…but…Bertha…had me to look at
it again…as…making peace with where I am…enjoying what I currently have…and…still
being hopeful…for more…
I like the change in that
perspective…making do…no longer feels
negative…like something to endure…and…I think about my non-tin roof…it’s only a
couple of years old…and…as much as I love the sound…I see no reason to consider
replacing the roof with tin…not…when I have gutters…I love going outside during
the rain…sitting on the porch…in Granny’s rocker…listening to the…ping…ping…ping…
Besides…something tells me…if I had
a tin roof…it…would…get hot…and…Bertha…would…put the cat on it…and…then…where
would I be…
Jane
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